“So in Christ Jesus you are all children of God through faith.” Galatians 3:26 (NIV)
Our lives as sexual assault survivors are full of loss. Maybe the loss of the trust of the person who abused you. The loss of your identity. The loss of innocence. The loss of family and friends who don’t believe you when you tell them what happened, or who can’t handle standing by you through the hard time of recovery. Loss.
This time of year I feel loss more than any other time. I’m sure you most likely do too. Especially, if like me, you are at odds with your family because of the abuse. They don’t understand, they were the perpetrators, or they don’t believe you. Whatever it may be, this time of year without family can be difficult. Bringing with it even more loss to our lives.
With Thanksgiving this week and Christmas following a month behind, you don’t have to look past your TV to see the happy faces of the season. The families and friends out having a good time. Shopping for loved ones, friends and co-workers.
Families gathering together around the table to give thanks at Thanksgiving. I will not be with my real family on Thanksgiving. We are at odds over my abuse. My friends have all left because they cannot handle the “hard” times. No one wants to be unhappy, or so they say. I wonder when these happy people let their guards down, or do they?
I learned long ago to be “real” with people. This is where I lost everyone. People don’t seem to want real. They want the “picture perfect” holidays and everyday life of happiness.
Well, I am here to let you know if you are feeling extra down from the losses you’ve experienced you are not alone. This year at Thanksgiving I will be with another friend who is in our similar situation.
It will be a non-traditional Thanksgiving in the sense of no family, yet we will be a family. We will come together under the same God, and we will give thanks we have one another to eat dinner with on Thanksgiving.
The most important One to invite to your Thanksgiving this year, whether you have a place to go or not, is Jesus. He is with you. He loves you. He longs to be the life-long resident in your heart so no matter where you are, you are not alone.
If you have never invited Jesus into your heart, asked Him to forgive you of your sins, and let Him take control of your life, now is the time. If you already have, then we are already family. We are brothers and sisters in Christ.
This is one family which will never leave you. Jesus will always be with you and you will spend eternity in Heaven with Him. He knows all about the abuse, the hurt, the heartache, and the loss. Yet, He still wants YOU.
I pray you will find a place to join someone for Thanksgiving this year. A community Thanksgiving dinner at a church, or banquet hall, or with another person to just gather with like me.
Most of all I pray you will pray this prayer and receive Jesus into your heart if you have not. Once you’ve prayed this prayer, pray the following one too.
Jesus longs to be our all. To fill the holes left by our losses, and to be there for us when everyone else fails.
“For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.” John 3:16 NIV
To clarify: In this prayer, admitting you are a sinner is just admitting you make mistakes, which we all do. We all sin. That is why we need Jesus. The abuse was not a sin on your part. You are asking forgiveness for other things you have done which were wrong.
I know I am a sinner. I have not led a perfect life. Please forgive me of my sins. I ask right now for you to come into my heart and become my Lord and Savior and be with me forever. I want to spend eternity in Heaven with You. Thank you Jesus.
I feel so broken because of my losses. Sometimes I don’t know who I am anymore because I feel like I am just a sexual assault survivor. Help me remember I am more than just this, but I am your Child. I need you to fill my life where there are so many holes. Fill them with You so I can be complete and whole again.
If you prayed and asked Jesus into your life today congratulations! I would be honored if you would send me a note through the “contact me” page so I can pray for you. God Bless!
© 2017 Susan M. Clabaugh. All Rights Reserved.